During this past week, I sat in my office with a couple that was definitely experiencing some disconnection issues. As the husband expressed his frustration regarding how his wife was treating him, he said, “I just wish you would treat me as good as you do the dog. I would be happy if you would simply love me as much as you do her.” Wow! What a statement. Yet, I wonder how many have us have felt similarly?
A survey by the American Veterinary Medical Association in 2013 reported that singles (especially men) are increasingly turning to their pets for love and for a sense of family. The release went on to state that pet ownership by all singles, including those who have never been married as well as those who are separated or divorced, jumped 16.6% from 2006 to 2011.
While on one hand it is easy to understand this because pets are terrific company for those who are alone. Pets can be wonderful companions who love us unconditionally. Yet, they are not meant to be substitutes for people – for human contact. And this is especially true if we are married.
I know that there are many individuals, like the one above, who feel as though their spouse loves the family dog more than them. Please understand that loving the animal isn’t the problem. I love my dogs Jolee and Bailey dearly, and yes, they are a part of the family. But they could never be a replacement for my wife. When a spouse makes a statement like that above, it is a thermometer reading that says – “We are not connected as partners and I desperately want to be.”
Do you show more love and care and attention for your spouse than you do the family dog? If you aren’t sure – I encourage you to do a self-check this week and evaluate how you might demonstrate greater attention and affection for him or her.