As we have looked at the faces of commitment in our last three times, we have examined the importance of following through on the things that we say we will do, remembering the big picture during times of conflict, and how we treat our mate when he or she is not present. In this final look at commitment I want to touch on the basics of love and respect.
Now you may be thinking, “Well, of course I should be showing my mate love and respect. Everyone knows that.” And you would be correct on both points, but unfortunately, we sometimes drop the ball here.
This is one of those things that we are good at when things are going well. When your spouse is treating you with love and respect, it is fairly easy to reciprocate. However, if he or she is disrespecting you, you probably find it very easy to slip into tit for tat behavior, showing them disrespect as well.
Honestly, if we are going to be genuinely committed to our mates, we need to learn to practice love and respect – even when we are tired and stressed, when we are crabby, and especially when we are unfairly mistreated. I’m reminded of Jesus’ words in Matthew 5:44 when he says, “Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.” Retaliation is easy – not productive, but easy.
We are called to be fully committed to our partner. And this involves giving them love and respect even when they don’t deserve it or we don’t feel like it. This is one of the basics, yet one of the most significant faces of commitment!