American poet Jimmy Santiago Baca once wrote, “Being human without forgiveness is like being a guitarist without fingers.” Most of us think of forgiveness as optional – if I feel like it or if the other person has groveled enough to earn it. But if Baca is correct, then forgiveness is anything but optional – it may indeed be the foundation to successful peace-filled living. Otherwise we may remain a prisoner of our past hurts and scars. And if we do that, we are definitely stuck. Truly not a fun place to live.
But we often wonder, “How can I forgive when I have been treated so badly?” That’s not easy. Yet, “not easy” is very different from “impossible.” You see we don’t have to ignore the hurts or pretend that they didn’t happen, because they did. Actually, the act of forgiveness enables us to clearly address those very hurts in a multitude of ways so that we can move forward.
I like the following quote that I recently read – “I want to let go of anything that sidetracks me from life now, so I can more easily focus on my intentions, my purpose in life, and what is most fulfilling.” Forgiving is not about letting someone off the hook – it is about me and my welfare and peace.
We may have thought that it’s not easy to forgive. But I would suggest that where my life is concerned, it is even harder not to.