“I just say, ‘Yes Dear,” was his response. Of course, you are wondering what the question was.
We were recently privileged to attend the anniversary party for a couple who have been married 65 years. Wow – that is longer than I have been alive (though not by much). At 88 and 85, Elinor and Archie could easily pass for 10 years younger than they are. As a matter of fact, Elinor had even made some of the food for the reception spread.
Family and friends had gathered for this memorable occasion to honor the anniversary couple. Yet, as I looked around the room, it was hard not to notice many couples who, though married for significantly shorter periods of time, seemed much less happy. Several were sitting across the room from their respective spouses, seemingly uninterested in engaging with them.
But this was not true of Elinor and Archie. As I visited with them, always wanting to glean wisdom from seasoned couples, I asked the question, “What is the secret to the longevity of your marriage.” That was when Archie responded with the quote that I began with. While that seemed a safe and humorous response – I couldn’t let it go at that. So I pressed for more.
Then they both chimed in saying that even though they had normal ups and downs and challenging times, they had made it a point of doing life together. They learned that by being intentional about this, they had developed a real affinity for one another. Simply stated – they just like hanging out together. And the longer they are together, the more they enjoy one another’s company.
While this may sound simplistic, know that no one gets to 65 years without some obstacles to overcome. Even so, they successfully found that committing to “do life together” made a huge difference in the enjoyment of the journey.
I encourage you this week with their tip – begin to learn ways to enjoy hanging out together. It will make the marriage a whole lot more fun.