Author and friend, Matt Heard writes in his book Life With a Capital L, “. . . we too often want our lives to be characterized by something that our individual days don’t come close to resembling. But the truth of the matter is a bunch of wasted days added together won’t make a significant life any more than a bunch of rotten or unripe grapes would be able to make a great wine.”
When most of us chose to marry, we had great visions for the future. Our spouse would love us unconditionally, they would treat us with kindness and consideration, they would believe that we were the best thing since sliced bread. And we would equally love and value them. However, as our relationship slipped into the routines of daily life, those earlier visions often become tainted and even forgotten. It is not that we still don’t desire a great relationship, because we do. Yet, we somehow seem surprised when it doesn’t come to fruition.
You see, our marriage, and our life, create a picture that is a result of those individual days. If I treasure my spouse, providing a safe haven for relationship, and strive to support them, viewing him or her as God does – I am much more likely to see those days add up into something of beauty. However, if my days consist of snide comments and a condescending and even combative attitude – my marriage will reflect that.
To take license and paraphrase Matt’s words as it applies to our relationships, I would state, “How I want my [marriage] to turn out had better be visible in my individual days, because the way I spend my days is the way I spend my [marriage], period. To be careless with my [spouse] is to be careless with my [marriage].”
Would you like for your relationship to resemble a fine wine? Then collect good grapes – in other words, treat your mate each day with care and love. If you will, they days will add up – into a marriage and a vision of beauty.