I came across an article a few months ago in which the author was complaining about the continual need for new passwords. I could relate as every 90 days my university wants me to change my computer password. In the case of the author of the article, his company made him change his every 30 days, and the new word could not be anything he had used in the previous three months. Plus it has to have a larger case letter, a number, and a special symbol.
He found himself furious at the need to do this. But he also realized that the larger part of his frustration and anger were aimed at his ex-wife and his recent divorce. He was still in shock at what she had done to him and he just couldn’t seem to crawl out of the emotional pit in which he found himself.
He decided that he was no longer going to be the victim in this recent breakup and determined to proactively do something about it – and it would begin with his password. This would be a word that he would have to type in multiple times a day for the next month so he wanted his focus to be thoughtful and worthwhile. Therefore, he made his password Forgive@h3r. And with that simple step, his view of his ex-wife changed over the next 30 days.
I don’t know whether or not you need to change your password but I would ask you to consider, are there negative places where you find yourself stuck in your significant relationship? If so, wouldn’t it be nice to not percolate there any longer? What can you begin to do today to dislodge that? Maybe it is something as simple as a changed password or perhaps it is the initiating of a conversation. Whatever it is, commit yourself to beginning that one small change today – and see where it can lead and what might be healed.