If you have more than one child, you have probably at some point felt “ganged up on” by the kids. Knowing the power inequity they experience, because you are the parent and they are not, they often find strength in numbers. It is to be expected. However, what you didn’t count on was being ganged up on by one of your offspring along with your spouse. Yet, when parents disagree about how to parent, this is exactly what has been known to take place.
I appreciate the work of Dr. Charles Fay and his sound advice to parents. In a recent article he addressed the conflict that so easily erupts when parents have differing ideas about the best ways to parent. I want to adapt and present three of those thoughts here.
- Agree on some core values. While your methods may differ, you probably have some common values that you both believe in.
- Agree to do your best to make the other parent look good. Sometimes in our effort to look like a good parent, we throw our spouse under the bus. Not good modeling for sure.
- Agree to put your marriage first. Remember, you may have been married before the kids and you certainly will be after the kids. Keep your priorities in check.
Your tip today – strive to collaborate with your spouse utilizing these three concepts.