I love hearing stories about how people are filled; what things lead to feeling valued and cherished – how they get their “crank turned.” My wife is a public school administrator. Occasionally, she will get a note from a past student or perhaps a card from a staff member, letting her know what an impact she has had on their education or career. She always comes home and shares those with me. Why? Because, as I listen to the lilt in her voice and see the gleam in her eye, I know that this has “turned her crank.”
I wonder today, how do you turn your partner’s crank? How do you validate him or let her know that she is cherished? My guess is that it is not by our sarcastic tone or our critical judgments. It is when we love them in a manner that speaks to them – when we love them in their love language. According to author Gary Chapman, that might be in offering words of affirmation, physical touch, gifts, quality time, or deeds of service.
We know what speaks to us – what helps us to feel loved. But do you know what blesses your significant other? If not, then I encourage you to do two things this week: 1) endeavor to discover your mate’s love language, and 2) creatively speak it. Now, of course, this requires time, thought, and effort. But wouldn’t you love to overhear your spouse telling their best friend, “You are not going to believe what he or she did for me today. It blew me away and filled my soul. I am so blessed to have them.” My guess is, hearing that would perhaps even “turn your crank.”